I made a deal with Jesus a couple of days ago. It went something like this:
I will honor my baby boy. I will follow your Spirit’s promptings. Help me to become sensitive to Your Spirit, so that I may be more sensitive to the needs of my baby. Help me to really follow you Jesus, in sacrificing my energy, time, pleasure, and body for my baby boy. Let me listen more acutely to your Spirit as You urge me to respond to my baby’s cries with the deepest empathy. Help me to savor his smiles, coos, and delight in me. May I drink in the fullness of your grace, so that I might fill my baby with beautiful things.
And tonight as Matt and I swap Rocking duty, I found this beautiful letter written from mother to child. I could not have written it better. I’m thankful for that Mother tonight. Tonight, I can rock my baby to sleep, knowing that soon, he will get it. He will go to sleep on his own, without my touch, without my voice, without my smell. And when he does, when he really gets it, I know that I’ll want to go back to these days.These days of being needed by him so desperately. These days of him waking as soon as my scent leaves his little nose. These days of him thinking that my arms hold paradise. I will want these days again, I’m sure. So till then, I will wait.